"You make me cry 'nights, although I know it's futile..."
Penny - founder of NASG
How many of you relate? "You make me cry 'nights, although I know it's futile. My tears can't buy your love....."
Such was my desperation.... all I wanted was his love and it was absolutely impossible to attain, no matter what I did. He was simply incapable of love. How many tears did I shed over the years? I think they would've filled a small plunge pool! We agonize, desperately trying all sorts of different ways to get our former "soul mate" to reappear and love us again. The saddest thing about this is that we are completely unaware of the fact that the charming, confident, popular and doting lover who swept us off our feet, never existed. It was all smoke and mirrors, a facade to get us to commit our all to them. Once hooked, they know we will be loyal and try everything to make the relationship work.
We seem to have a sign on our forehead that reads "I will tolerate abuse way more than others" which is precisely what we do. And, worst of all, they can see it!! This sign is of course due to low self-esteem, a lack of confidence in our abilities, and incorrect beliefs we hold, usually connected to the shame and trauma we were subjected to in our formative years.
My suggestion for the day...... GET OUT THE ERASER NOW...... and write a new message (a powerful one!) onto your forehead, so the next time you come into contact with a narcissist, the words will be quite clear - I SEE YOU AND I'M OUT OF HERE!
Actually, the words will appear all by themselves thankfully, as you learn self-care and heal from the emotional abuse you have endured.
You are all in a different stage on your journey, either Victim, Survivor, or Thriver. Remember to be kind to yourselves, compassionate and loving. Dispel any negativity from the inner critic.
I wish you all a wonderfully peaceful day, void of any kind of abuse!
Such was my desperation.... all I wanted was his love and it was absolutely impossible to attain, no matter what I did. He was simply incapable of love. How many tears did I shed over the years? I think they would've filled a small plunge pool! We agonize, desperately trying all sorts of different ways to get our former "soul mate" to reappear and love us again. The saddest thing about this is that we are completely unaware of the fact that the charming, confident, popular and doting lover who swept us off our feet, never existed. It was all smoke and mirrors, a facade to get us to commit our all to them. Once hooked, they know we will be loyal and try everything to make the relationship work.
We seem to have a sign on our forehead that reads "I will tolerate abuse way more than others" which is precisely what we do. And, worst of all, they can see it!! This sign is of course due to low self-esteem, a lack of confidence in our abilities, and incorrect beliefs we hold, usually connected to the shame and trauma we were subjected to in our formative years.
My suggestion for the day...... GET OUT THE ERASER NOW...... and write a new message (a powerful one!) onto your forehead, so the next time you come into contact with a narcissist, the words will be quite clear - I SEE YOU AND I'M OUT OF HERE!
Actually, the words will appear all by themselves thankfully, as you learn self-care and heal from the emotional abuse you have endured.
You are all in a different stage on your journey, either Victim, Survivor, or Thriver. Remember to be kind to yourselves, compassionate and loving. Dispel any negativity from the inner critic.
I wish you all a wonderfully peaceful day, void of any kind of abuse!
penny@C2C.co.za
www.courage2change.co.za for support
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